Reader's Digest -julkaisun October 2016 -irtonumeron sisällysluettelo

THIS MONTH I’VE BEEN THINKING a lot about family. For the first time, our two kids are living a long ways away. Rachel, 22, just began graduate school in Los Angeles, studying to be a nurse; Neil, 19, is a sophomore in college, also in LA. I’m in Connecticut, on the other side of the country, and I’m struggling to stay in touch and show them I love them. My mom understands how I tussle with this. She’s almost 90, upbeat and energetic, and a gas to talk to about any topic. But from the first time I moved away from home, I know that I haven’t been the dream son in letting her know how much I’m thinking of her. I’m realizing there are many ways, besides phone calls,…

ALMOST EVERY NIGHT for more than ten years, Kirk Alexander, 48, of Salem, Oregon, ordered dinner from his local Domino’s pizzeria. Sometimes he’d call for a salad, sometimes a pie, sometimes chicken wings. Then one day, he stopped calling. “It had been 11 days,” Domino’s general manager Sarah Fuller told katu.com, “which is not like him.” Sarah had known Kirk since 2009. Many Domino’s delivery drivers regularly made the short trip to Kirk’s house, about six minutes away. She knew he worked from home and that he rarely ventured outside. She also knew that he had suffered health issues in the past. Something, Sarah worried, was wrong. Around 1 a.m. on Sunday, May 8, Sarah sent delivery driver Tracey Hamblen to Kirk’s home. Tracey approached the door as he had…

ALWAYS THERE On a crisp fall morning, my daughter Laura went to pose for her senior pictures with her brother Josh’s bright green snowboard. Josh had died in a motorcycle accident the summer before, and Laura, an avid snowboarder, wanted his board in the shot. The photographer knew the perfect backdrop—a vibrant graffiti wall in town. He peered through the lens, focused, and gasped. We all looked up and read the words spray-painted on the wall above Laura’s head: “Big Bro Is Watching.” What a beautiful reassurance that she has a guardian angel. LYNN ELSNER, Missoula, Montana LOVE ON A LEASH While strolling along a popular boardwalk with my dog, Cheswick, I was quickly surrounded by a dozen people who wanted to pet him. Cheswick, however, focused on a distraught…

AT HER GRADE SCHOOL graduation in June, as we walked up the steps together, my daughter Olivia stopped and asked me a question: “Be honest, Mommy; is being a grown-up fun?” All her hope, excitement, and worry were contained in that single question. She gripped my hand tightly, and I squeezed it back. At dinner, the talk turned to high school and college. Olivia and Sophia couldn’t imagine not living with us. “Oh, that will change,” I said. “You’ll want to leave, but it won’t be because you love us any less.” Tell them about Fatima, said Steve. Fatima was the bright, strong-willed young woman I’d gotten to know a few weeks earlier at a writing conference. Her story had made me shiver and push away thoughts of the skirmishes…

LAST YEAR, I baked brownies for strangers to whom I was grateful. They thanked me for my gesture. And that was it—an exchange so simple, you’ll be surprised at the complexity of its rewards. It started when I called 911 after finding my partner unconscious on the floor. Within minutes, a police cruiser arrived, followed by an ambulance filled with first responders who whisked my partner to the emergency room, where he received the critical care he needed. A week later, I wrote thank-you notes and dropped them off at the police station and the firehouse with batches of still-warm brownies. After the firefighters thanked me for delivering the gifts, I drove away feeling both light and happy. That natural high is increasingly understood to be a benefit of gratitude.…

DAD AND I LOVED baseball and hated sleep. One midsummer dawn when I was nine, we drove to the local park with our baseballs, gloves, and Yankees caps. “If you thought night baseball was a thrill, just wait,” Dad told me. “Morning air carries the ball like you’ve never seen.” He was right. Our fastballs charged faster and landed more lightly. The echoes of our catches popped as the sun rose over the dew-sprinkled fields. The park was all ours for about two hours. Then a young mother pushed her stroller toward us. When she neared, Dad politely leaned over the stroller, waved, and gave the baby his best smile. The mother ogled at him for a second, then rushed away. Dad covered his mouth with his hand and walked…

■WHAT’S MY PILL SCHEDULE? If the instructions say “take every eight hours,” pay attention, says Barbara Young, PharmD, MHA, an editor of consumer medication information for the American Society of Health-System Pharmacists. “That’s not the same as taking three doses at any time of day,” she warns—a common misinterpretation. Antibiotics really do work best when taken with an equal amount of time between doses, which keeps the right amount of the medication in your bloodstream throughout the day. Instead of taking a pill with every meal, forinstance, you and your doctor might find that taking one as soon as you wake up, during a midday snack, and right before bed is a better schedule. ■WHAT IF I MISS A DOSE? You’ll be glad you asked—some antibiotics will work best if…

PART I: Laughs from Gaffes Bypass the remark you’d always regret in favor of the version you’ll shamelessly repeat INSTEAD OF SAYING THIS … “It is better to live one day as a lion than 100 years as a sheep.” DONALD TRUMP (retweeting a Beni to Mussolini quote) … SAY THIS: “The lion shall lie down with the calf, but the calf won’t get much sleep.” WOODY ALLEN INSTEAD OF SAYING THIS … “I thought Europe was a country.” KELLIE PICKLER, country music singer … SAY THIS: “If our Founding Fathers wanted us to care about the rest of the world, they wouldn’t have declared their independence from it.” STEPHEN COLBERT INSTEAD OF SAYING THIS … “I make Jessica Simpson look like a rock scientist.” TARA REID, actress … SAY…

THEODORE ROOSEVELT, who battled the excesses of the Gilded Age, was always careful to point out that he was not hostile to corporations; rather, he was “endeavoring to do away with any evil in them.” Sorry, Teddy, but wrongdoing has not been expunged. The past few decades alone have seen the lies of tobacco companies exposed, Enron and Tyco collapse under the weight of malfeasance, and financial institutions that cooked the books lead us into the Great Recession. You might think that today’s large corporations would have learned from such misdeeds. As these companies show, you’d be mistaken. VOLKSWAGEN: CHEATED TO BEAT EMISSIONS TESTS THE PITCH: Volkswagen promised consumers that its diesel-engine cars were not only fuel efficient but also clean enough to meet U.S. Environmental Protection Agency air-quality standards.…

MADE FOR that special bovine in your life, Farmer’s Cologne is “beautiful for a man or woman, and also pleasing for cows,” says creator Lisa Broder. One whiff of this all-natural cologne crafted from essential oils and Bessie’ll give milk till the … well, you-know-who comes home. A two-ounce bottle costs $115. Source: Bangor Daily News BELLA MIA, a Maltese terrier, enjoys the finer things in life, including filet mignon and having her own boudoir with a double bed. Which is why her owner, a New York accountant, is leaving more than $1 million in her will to Bella. She wants to ensure that she’s “taken care of in the way that she’s used to.” Source: Daily Mail A NORWEGIAN COUPLE were afraid that their bulldog, Igor, would feel homesick…

1 How creative you are. Creative people are more likely to dream about unusual settings (rather than home or work) and about obstacles in the natural world, such as a log or a rock they can’t get around. 2Your political views. Selfdescribed conservatives are more likely to have mundane, realistic dreams, while liberals have more bizarre dreams. Does that mean liberals are more open-minded? Or that they’re caught up in their own fantasies? Take your pick. 3 That you’ve got a heart problem. People who have frequent nightmares may be significantly more likely to suffer from an irregular heartbeat or chest pain compared with those who don’t have them, found a study of older adults. That may be because heart problems can make it more difficult to breathe at night.…

Best Stories in America I listen to the Moth on NPR, and I love it! Reading the stories in your magazine was every bit as good. It was impossible for me to pick a favorite. MAGGIE HARRIS, Akron, Ohio Colin Ryan, your story about Michelle Siever speaking up for you in sixth grade made my day. Some of the best and sweetest students of all are also some of the most unpopular. Thank goodness for those that are! PEG IVEY, Li ti tz, Pennsylvania The story by Ray Christian about being a black Boy Scout is appalling. It’s sad that any child swimming in a pool could be treated with such cruelty by what are considered “fellow Americans”! KARYL J. KLINE, Pennsburg, Pennsylvania Secrets of the Carnies OK, granted, some…

ANDY SIMMONS looks glum for a simple reason: He’s been shopping for a new dining room set. ANDY’S HOUSE By Hudson Simmons I had just spent a busy afternoon barking at motorcycles, lunging at joggers, and digging holes in the backyard, so I was famished when I sat down for dinner. Luckily, the proprietor of Andy’s House does not skimp on portions, offering entire banisters, whole couches, and the complete American Girl doll collection. Unable to control myself, I first attacked the cold antipasti plate: an exciting assortment of remote controls, lamp cords, and children’s art projects. The remotes were crisp and enthralling, with a touch of maple syrup from when the owner’s daughter clutched them at breakfast. After licking off the Play button, I pried open the hard shell…

With women, there’s this constant weird cultural thing where we’re always … comparing ourselves with one another. Who wore it best? Whose butt’s better? Instead, how about if everyone wins? MELISSA MCCARTHY, actress, in Redbook IT’S SO HARD to forget pain, but it’s even harder to remember sweetness. We have no scar to show for happiness. CHUCK PALAHNIUK, novelist, in his book Diary I LEARNED FROM [waitressing] what a TSA agent told me many years after: “Everyone’s carrying the same things.” ... We both understood that she was speaking metaphorically too: Everyone’s carrying the same burdens, the same woes one way or another. We have more in common than we know. PEGGY NOONAN, columnist, in the Wall Street Journal MONSTERS ARE REAL, and they are us. Once I had kids,…

… EAT FOOD THAT HAS FALLEN INTO THE SINK OR ON THE FLOOR? Your kitchen sink is one of the germiest places in your home, with about 18,000 bacteria per square inch. In comparison, the kitchen floor in front of the sink has, on average, 830 bacteria per square inch. ANSWER: The sink … SKIP CLEANING YOUR BBQ OR YOUR TOILET SEAT? The grill, including the preparation area around it, may have more than double the bacteria of the average toilet seat, according to a British survey. Food or utensils placed there could be contaminated by raw meat or animal feces from outdoor exposure. Use an ammonia-based cleaner to sanitize before each use. ANSWER: BBQ … USE TOO LITTLE DETERGENT OR TOO MUCH? Too many suds can actually trap dirt…

■ HAVE A SPOONFUL OF PEANUT BUTTER The fat and protein of nuts help ward off a debilitating blood sugar crash by slowing digestion, says Jennifer Powell Weddig, PhD, RDN, a professor of nutrition at Metropolitan State University in Denver. “Or try hummus with vegetables, which have fiber, which can slow the absorption of simple sugars.” ■ TAKE THE STAIRS AFTER EATING “This will help your muscles use the blood sugar instead of storing it,” says Amanda Bontempo, MS, RD, CDN, an oncology dietitian and wellness coordinator at NYU Langone’s Laura and Isaac Perlmutter Cancer Center. Proof that short exercise bursts work: A study in Diabetes Care found that older adults who walked for just 15 minutes after each meal had lower blood sugar levels than those who walked for…

A Deep Breath for City Dwellers Does exposure to everyday urban air contaminants outweigh the health benefits of regularly walking or cycling outdoors? According to computer modeling from Cambridge University and several other institutions, a city dweller on average would need to walk for 16 hours each day or bicycle for 7 in order to inhale enough pollutants to trump the health boost provided by regular physical activity. The Pain of Repetition Performing physical labor (such as bending and lifting) day in, day out for years is known to contribute to osteoarthritis, or deterioration of cartilage that cushions joints. Now a Swedish study has revealed a possible link between these tasks and rheumatoid arthritis, an autoimmune condition that inflames the joints. Those at risk could include workers in the construction,…

THE FRANK CHURCH-RIVER OF NO RETURN Wilderness is the broadest sprawl of untamed landscape in the contiguous United States, covering 2.4 million acres of central Idaho. Among the area’s most spectacular attractions is the Bighorn Crags, a jagged phalanx of 10,000-foot peaks set amid glittering alpine lakes. Near one of those pools, just after dawn on a cloudless summer day, 13-year-old Charlie Finlayson crouches inside his tent, getting ready for a long hike. He stows a water bottle and some snacks in his day pack, along with a sleeping bag, in case he has to bivouac. He leaves another water bottle for his father, David; fills the cooking pot to the brim with water from the creek; and also sets out a week’s supply of energy bars. Then he takes…

ON OCTOBER 28, 1886, as many as one million people flocked to Lower Manhattan to witness the unveiling of Liberty Enlightening the World (aka the Statue of Liberty) in New York Harbor. Join us in wishing her a happy 130th birthday with this roundup of monumental trivia. The cost of building Lady Liberty and her pedestal was more than $500,000—or at least $12 million today. She may be old, but she gets the odd stretch in. In winds of 50 mph or more, her body can sway up to three inches and her torch arm, up to six. There are seven rays on her crown, one for each of the world’s continents. Together, they give her a hat that weighs more than 1,000 pounds. She has a face a mother…

1. manumission (man-yoo-'mihshin) n.—A: spy operation. B: the act of freeing from slavery. C: handiwork. 2. complicit (kom-'plih-siht) adj.— A: elaborate. B: in total agreement. C: associating with or participating in. 3. equivocate (ih-'kwih-vuh-kayt) v.—A: waffle. B: share evenly. C: tremble. 4. enterprising ('ehn-ter-pry-zing) adj.—A: go-getting. B: trespassing. C: just beginning. 5. homilies ('hah-muh-leez) n.— A: family relations. B: sermons. C: opposites. 6. venerated ('veh-nuh-ray-ted) adj.—A: exhausted. B: honored. C: pardoned. 7. restitution (res-tih-'too-shuhn) n.—A: truce. B: imprisonment. C: amends. 8. dissidents ('diss-ih-dihnts) n.— A: dissenters. B: immigrants. C: tossers of insults. 9. obfuscates ('ahb-fuh-skayts) v.— A: substitutes. B: glides gracefully. C: confuses. 10. jettison ('jeh-tih-sen) v.—A: turn black. B: rise rapidly. C: throw away. 11. intemperate (ihn-'tem-puh-riht) adj.—A: permanent. B: hard to resist. C: unrestrained. 12. vacuous ('va-kew-uhs) adj.—…

ALEX YAWOR leans in to study his nearly finished portrait of a man in uniform. He picks up a thin paintbrush and, resting an arm against a maulstick, carefully fills in a badge on the soldier’s chest. As he does so, he quietly asks, “Why did you have to die?” The old man thinks about this a lot. Almost every day for the past seven years, he has sat behind a wooden easel in his daughter’s basementturned-studio in Hopewell Township, Pennsylvania, and painted portraits of servicemen and -women who will never see the final product. He then frames, boxes, and ships the paintings to the families, free of charge. On a certain level, Alex can relate to those he paints. A World War II Marine veteran himself, Alex fought in…

LET’S SAY I meet you on a bus. We really hit it off, but I’ve got to exit soon, so you’re going to tell me three things about yourself that help me understand who you are, that get at your essence. I’m wondering: Of those three things, is one of them surviving some kind of trauma, like being a cancer survivor, a war survivor, or an abuse survivor? Many of us tend to identify ourselves by our wounds, and where I’ve seen this survivor identity have the most consequences is in the cancer community. I’ve been part of this community for a long time. I’ve been a hospice and hospital chaplain for nearly 30 years. In 2005, I was working at a cancer center when I learned I had breast…

ON OCTOBER 15, 2011, Scott Griffin and friends went to the Haunted Trail in San Diego, a Halloween attraction run by the Haunted Hotel, Inc. Printed on tickets was a warning that the trail had “highimpact scares.” Visitors walked a milelong path along which actors dressed in ghoulish costumes and carrying prop weapons jumped out to frighten—and even chase—them. Griffin, then 44, and his friends completed the trail and walked through what appeared to be the exit. They were laughing about how much fun they’d had, when suddenly an actor with a revving chain saw came toward them. The Haunted Hotel calls this the Carrie effect, referring to the last scene in the 1976 horror movie, when the audience, believing the film is over, is surprised by one final scare.…

From what you eat to what keeps your family happy and healthy, brands are trusted because they’re reliable enough to become part of your everyday story. We asked Americans to vote for the brands they trust across 40+ categories of products and services. Here are the stories behind the 2016 Trusted Brands. MOUTHWASH LISTERINE 50%: Amount of people who suffer from chronic bad breath, according to the American Dental Association. Listerine was originally invented as a surgical antiseptic (its name even comes from the founding father of antiseptics, Dr. Joseph Lister). Listerine was marketed to dentists as early as 1895, but didn’t gain its mouth-freshening reputation until the formula’s owners coined the term “halitosis” in a series of 1920s ads. CEREAL KELLOGG’S 48%: Amount of Americans who add chocolate milk…

THE TOUGHEST part of the job for medical providers? Deciphering what was written in patient charts. ■Left nose fracture, but his right nose is OK. ■An autopsy was refused by the patient. ■She’s OK; she just went into heart failure. ■I think he has sleep apathy. ■Patient had a “Cadillac arrest.” ■This is a 52 YO with type 2 DM who was dragged in here by his wife. ■No significant issues other than she is a little on the slightly side. Source: gigglemed.com MY COWORKER Candy burst into the office one morning and declared, “Well, here it is—the 16-year anniversary of my having married too young.” LYNETTE COMBS, Norfolk, Virginia THE MEETINGSPEAK-TO-ENGLISH TRANSLATOR: ■“This wasn’t on my calendar” = I deleted this from my calendar. ■“Duly noted” = I’ve already…

FOR THE FIRST SIX MONTHS of Alexander’s life, I wanted to believe he might get well on his own. I would often lie down on the floor and make faces at him, trying to tease out a smile. Sometimes, after lots of effort, it worked. But mostly, my son was motionless and silent, his eyes focused on nothing in particular. It was fall 2009, and my wife, Ashley, and I had only just moved into a new home in downtown Calgary, Alberta. We had a vivacious four-year-old daughter named Sloane, a grouchy Siamese cat, and an infant son who was a mystery. Alexander had been born hypotonic—floppy, basically—with an abdominal hernia, a heart murmur, strange folds on his ears, and a V-shaped birthmark in the center of his forehead. The…

What’s the world for if you can’t make it up the way you want it? TONI MORRISON, novel i st BARN’S BURNT DOWN—NOW I CAN SEE THE MOON. MIZUTA MASAHIDE, Japanese poet Discipline equals freedom. JOCKO WILLINK, ret ired Navy SEAL People get stuck simply because they’re stuck telling a story about why they’re stuck. HEATHER HAVRILESKY, advice columni st MOST OF THE TIME I FEEL ENTIRELY UNQUALIFIED TO BE A PARENT. I CALL THESE TIMES BEING AWAKE. JIM GAFFIGAN, comedian BOOKS ARE NO MORE THREATENED BY KINDLE THAN STAIRS BY ELEVATORS. STEPHEN FRY, actor In recognizing the humanity of our fellow beings, we pay ourselves the highest tribute. THURGOOD MARSHALL, Supreme Court just ice LaserSpineInstitute.com…