Globe January 15, 2024

HIGH SPIRITS Bourbon-slinging Vampire Diaries hunk IAN SOMERHALDER is dead set on having a blast in Las Vegas HE’S A REAL PUSSYCAT! Hard-nosed movie hero STEVEN SEAGAL shows he’s a big softie by bottle feeding a baby lion in Dubai SLICK MOVES Former Today gabber KATHIE LEE GIFFORD glosses her lips on the go in Nashville STOUT & ABOUT JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT — 9-1-1’s Maddie Buckley — looks like she’s eating for a party of five! WATTLE YOU KNOW? Beetlejuice babe GEENA DAVIS now has a frighteningly saggy turkey neck MR. MAGOO GOES TO ENGLAND Four-eyes TED DANSON appears dazed as the Cheers alum steps out in London…

COUGAR Mariah Carey is wasting no time hunting for a new toyboy cub to cuddle after being kicked to the curb by studly dancer Bryan Tanaka, pals dish. The 54-year-old Touch My Body songbird hungers for a dumb stud in his 20s who won’t be as needy as Bryan, 40, who took a hike when she refused to have kids, according to sources. “Mariah is saying Bryan became too needy and wasn’t even that great a lover, so now it’s about finding someone hotter and more controllable,” spills an insider. “Her people are discreetly finding twentysomething guys willing to follow her around and agree to signing a nondisclosure agreement even before the first blind date.” The Obsessed singer craves a guy who can serve as a toyboy and assistant all…

SEPARATION is a slippery slope, but Kyle Richards’ estranged husband is getting a real lift from skiing with two nearly nude Venezuelan snow bunnies — even though he’s still living under the same roof with his Real Housewives ex! Super-agent Mauricio Umansky, 53, has been hitting the slopes with singer Anitta, 30, and YouTube sensation Lele Pons, 27, whose ski togs consisted entirely of strategically wrapped bath sheets. The founder of high-octane celeb firm The Agency shot the snowbirds schussing downhill in skimpy twin towels while sipping pricey Veuve Clicquot champagne, and uploaded the frisky footage to his Instagram Story with the sly commentary: “Some fun shenanigans about to occur!” In an unusual arrangement, Mauricio and Kyle, 55, still share a home in Los Angeles but lead separate lives now…

HEARTBROKEN Sandra Bullock has quit looking for love following the devastating death of her sweetheart Bryan Randall, according to pals, who say he’s the first thing she thinks of in the morning and the last thing she thinks of at night. Courageous photog Randall, 57, passed away in August following an agonizing three-year battle with ALS — an incurable nerve disease that destroys control of muscles for movement and breathing. Now, the distraught 59-year-old Ocean’s 8 beauty says she doesn’t see another romance in her near future, say insiders. “It took Sandra a long time to trust and fall in love with Bryan,” says a source. “They were together for eight years when Bryan was diagnosed with ALS. Sandra took care of him and was by his side when he died.…

AN ELDERLY heir to the Hermès luxury brand dynasty has rocked the family by adopting his 51-year-old gardener — putting the groundskeeper in line for half of the tycoon’s $13.2 billion fortune! What’s more, 80-year-old Nicolas Puech has pruned the greenbacks he originally earmarked for the Isocrates Foundation, a charity he founded in 2011! But the charity is fighting the move. Puech is a fifth-generation descendant of Thierry Hermès, who in 1837 created the French fashion house known for its $30,000 Birkin bags. The reclusive Swiss resident has begun the legal process of adopting the gardener — who apparently has two children and a wife in Spain — in an unusual and controversial maneuver straight out of the hit streaming series Succession, insiders dish. It would mean the lucky landscaper may…

DEVASTATED pop star Joe Jonas is in therapy after suffering severe post-traumatic stress disorder over his brutal divorce from Game of Thrones siren Sophie Turner, sources dish. The 34-year-old singer is struggling to cope with being separated from the 27-year-old strawberry blonde, mom to his toddler daughters, Willa and Delphine, who is now flaunting her wild fling with British blueblood Peregrine “Perry” Pearson, spies tattle. News of Sophie’s romance with the 29-year-old aristocratic fat cat, who works in property development in London, spread like wildfire after they were spotted smooching at October’s Rugby World Cup Final in Paris. Now Joe’s “privately telling friends she’s putting him through the wringer and it’s left him a nervous wreck!” spills an insider. “The way she’s carrying on with this Perry guy makes Joe…