Table of contents for December 2020/January 2021 in Reader's Digest

“DUDE, DRIVE SAFE,” I said at the door of my son’s tiny old Subaru, which I’d helped him pack to the brim. Neil was moving 1,000 miles away, to Nashville. “You know I love you.” “Love you, too, Dad,” he replied, looking me in the eye. “I’m good.” And he was. When Neil came home in 2019 after a humbling final year in college, Susan and I didn’t much know him. He didn’t know himself either. But we were all willing to connect on an honest level. Susan and I listened better. He got sober and healthy in mind and body. Gradually, we felt like a team. The quarantine, which struck six months in, only helped us. We got into a day-to-day rhythm and learned how to back each other…

IN MARCH 2019, when Sara Cook first got a letter in the mail telling her that someone had paid off a chunk of her medical debt, she thought it was fake. “It seemed like one of those e-mails you get that says you have a long-lost uncle and you just inherited two million dollars,” Cook says. Cautiously, she called the number listed on the letter. What she learned was that this was not a scam or even a joke. It was 100 percent real. A remarkable nonprofit called RIP Medical Debt had indeed paid $5,000 toward her bills. The organization didn’t take care of all the debt she’d amassed from several back surgeries, but the former nurse was still awed by the gesture. “I felt really loved and blessed,” she…

♦ Putting up the Christmas tree this weekend because life with a toddler isn’t dangerous, messy, and terrifying enough already. —@DadandBuried ♦ How to Decorate a Christmas Tree When You Have Kids: 1. Unpack ornament. 2. Drop so that it shatters into a million pieces. 3. Repeat. —@Lhlodder ♦ Wow, my kids are decorating the heck out of this small lower left section of our Christmas tree. —@simoncholland ♦ ME: I hate putting up the Christmas tree every year. SEVEN-YEAR-OLD: So why do you take it down? —@XplodingUnicorn (JAMES BREAKWELL)…

FOR YEARS, Janice Holly Booth endured her mother’s lengthy airing of grievances about her aches and pains. It got so bad that Booth felt her mother’s excessive grumbling was ruining the quality of their time together, so she finally spoke up. I know you probably don t realize it,” Booth told her mother, “but you spend the first 20 to 30 minutes of every conversation complaining.” When her mother objected, the two agreed to start keeping a running tally. “When we’d sit down to talk, I’d bring a notepad,” Booth says. “When she’d start off on a tear, she’d see me writing, catch herself, then stop.” Before long, it was clear that Booth s intervention not only helped her mother—it also helped their relationship. “Now her recitation of maladies takes…

♦ Nothing says “I love you” like diamonds. Nothing says “I drew you in a workplace Secret Santa” like Starbucks gift cards. —@samlymatters ♦ A colleague has just been fired from work and someone else put her hand up and asked how it would affect the Secret Santa. —@gO_f1sh ♦ I’m sorry, I thought that a Secret Santa’s job is to share all the secrets he knows about the person with everyone in the office. —@Cheeseboy22 ♦ To whatever coworker pulls my name in the Secret Santa drawing today, I’m a size 24 pack of frosted Pop-Tarts. —@dreamthievin ♦ Secret Santa is very disappointing if you’re self-employed. —@davidschneider…

*From RD.COM and THEHEALTHY.COM 1 Hair, Hair, Everywhere PETS So, you’ve got a shedder whose weekly brushing sessions leave him tidy and well-groomed but you looking like a shag carpet? Cut a pair of pantyhose into pieces just big enough to fit over the brush’s head, allowing the bristles to poke fully through the material. Your pup’s fur will cling to the pantyhose instead of your shirt. Then simply toss the pantyhose for an easy cleanup. 2 Penny-Test Your Tires AUTO Figuring out if you really need those new tires the shop recommends can be tricky. Who’s a more trustworthy consultant than Honest Abe? Slide a penny upside down into various parts of the tread. If you can see any of Lincoln’s head, the tread is too worn and the tires…

FROM SOUTHERN LIVING I WAITED TOO LATE to thank Unele Ed for that Christmas Eve, but I guess he and I were never the kind of men who wrote many notes, or read them. Even around Christmas, when a little silliness and frivolity is easier to tolerate, men of a eertain time, place, and elass are unlikely to have anything to do with a thank-you eard. We would just as soon go earoling in a light-up sweater. Southern men like us tend to keep the holiday our way and let others keep it theirs. Still, some Christmases are kept better than others. Some flash in and out of our memories, like a short in an old string of lights. For me, it will always be 1969 that blinks baek into…

I think for so many, the silver lining should be a simple message, that happiness is found at home and from within. I’m thankful for all the traveling my spouse and I got to do in our 45 years together. We saw so many countries and met interesting people. But we never knew the contentment we had right here. Dusting off the Scrabble board we’d bought in ’75 and taking it out on the back screened-in porch was so enjoyable—with the bonus of seeing and hearing all the birds chirping! —MARGARET WAGGONER Milton, Florida My daughter told me that people in nursing homes and assisted living centers were looking for pen pals to help them combat the loneliness brought on by the COVID-19 pandemic. I have always loved to write…

It’s All Relatives My wife got mad at me for buying the family-size pack of Oreos for just the two of us and I was like, “Are we or are we not a family?” —@Average_Dad1 Instead of “XOXOXOXOX” my mom ends every e-mail with “MOMOMOMOM.” —@ErinBode My uncle only polished the front half of his car because it was the only part he saw when he drove it. —@GalgosRGreat My little sister discovered we have different dads; now she’s trying to say we’re just friends … —@ntnastyy Opening gifts that say “From Mom and Dad” and knowing that Dad is going to be just as surprised as you are. —@kelllicopter My grandmother sewed and crocheted until she was into her 90s and her hands just couldn’t do it any longer.…

FROM PITCHFORK.COM LISTENING ТО NEW music is hard. Not hard compared to going to space or war, but hard compared to listening to music we already know. Especially those of us who have settled into the groove of adult life often don’t listen to new music because it’s easy to forgo the act of discovery when work, rent, children, and life come into play. Eventually, we bow our heads and cross a threshold where most music becomes something to remember rather than something to experience. Most people have all the songs they could ever need by the time they turn 30. And thanks to Spotify and Apple Music, we can easily whisk ourselves back to the gates and gables of our youth, when life was simpler. Why leap off a…

1. canticle n. (‘kan-tih-kuhl) A sacred flame. B small chapel. C Biblical song. 2. asana n. (‘ah-suh-nuh) A sweat lodge. B yoga pose. C spiritual guide. 3. halal adj. (huh-’lahl) A in a trance. B on a pilgrimage. C fit or lawful. 4. mezuzah n. (muh-’zoo-zah) A scroll hung by a door. B golden halo. C organ composition. 5. vespers n. (‘veh-sperz) A evening service. B silent worship. C winged cherubs. 6. genuflect v. (‘jen-yoo-flekt) A donate. B ponder. C kneel. 7. lama n. (‘lah-muh) A prayer shawl. B humble offering. C Buddhist monk. 8. halcyon adj. (‘hal-see-on) A awesome. B peaceful. C mythical. 9. atone v. (uh-’tohn) A begin fasting. B bow down to. C make up for. 10. ashram n. (‘ah-shrum) A burial mound. B Nativity scene. C religious retreat. 11. homily n. (‘hah-muh-lee) A sermon. B hymn. C…

Extraordinary Uses for Ordinary Things You recommend lining fridge drawers with paper towels to absorb the moisture that causes produce to rot. We call our crisper the rotter because it’s where good-intentioned veggies die a forgotten death. An entire roll couldn’t save them from impending doom. —DENISE THIERY Alexandria, Kentucky Letters from the Front I appreciate Andrew Carroll’s collection of wartime letters from soldiers. I have 200 letters from my husband from his tours in Vietnam: exchanges about our romance and upcoming wedding, his experiences in Da Nang and Tan San Nhut, and, later, our new daughter. The letters are our biggest nonliving treasure, and our kids treasure them too and will pass them down to their own children. —KATHY STEENSON Forest Ranch, California My School Desk—in a Bar This…

ALISON MALMON WAS a freshman at the University of Pennsylvania when she got a call from her mother that would change her life: Her fun, outgoing older brother, Brian, had taken his own life. When Malmon returned to school after Brian’s funeral that spring of 2000, she was still grieving. But when she looked for help on campus, there was no place to turn. Back then, says Malmon, “students weren’t encouraged to talk about their mental health. I started reflecting on the fact that there was an immense need to get that conversation going.” She was only 19 and had no experience with mental health issues, but that didn’t stop her from launching Open Minds at Penn. Now, 20 years later and with a new name—Active Minds—it is the largest…

IN 1955, a farmer named Vince Kosuga had a villainous idea: He would corner the market on me, the common onion. Kosuga set about buying up all the onions in the country, storing millions of pounds of me in the cavernous, corrugated warehouses he built on his New York farm and around the country. Then he bought up all the onions that were still in the ground, too, in the form of futures. As you might expect, Kosuga took advantage of his monopoly by raising my price. Then he flooded the market with his stockpiled (and by this point, rotting) wares while making bet after bet in the commodities market that the price would drop. By the time Kosuga had made his fortune—$8.5 million, to be exact—a 50-pound bag of…

WATCH FOR DANGEROUS HAND SANITIZERS Liquid hand sanitizer quickly became one of the year’s must-have health products, but beware: Some of them are actually dangerous. The FDA has warned against those that contain methanol, or wood alcohol, which can be toxic or even deadly if it’s ingested. Other sanitizers contain less than 60 percent ethanol or isopropanol (the correct type of rubbing alcohols), which means they are not potent enough to kill many germs. Doctors’ advice: Use soap and water whenever you can. It is still the best protection. EXERCISE EXCUSES AND HEART MEDS Just because you are taking heart medication doesn’t mean you can go easier on other cardiovascular care. A Finnish study that followed more than 40,000 people for 13 years showed that people who started preventive prescriptions…

CHRISTMAS AT MY house meant fresh pine boughs wrapped around the banister with velvet ribbon, candles in every window, and homemade dinners for 20 cooked by Mom. Mom was the only girl in a house full of four brothers, so when she had a home of her own to decorate and two daughters to dress up, she didn’t hold back. Christmas was a monthlong ritual we waited for all year, running errands in our matching red coats. On Christmas Day, we’d open the wreath-covered front door to welcome cousins and aunts and uncles. Over the years, the dining room table—from my father’s own childhood as one of 13 siblings—was adjusted to expand as partners, then spouses, then kids crowded around the table, Mom holding court over us all. I always…

EVERY SUPERHERO, no matter how small, needs a cape. That was Robyn Rosenberger’s motivation when she started sewing superhero capes for kids with cancer, heart defects, and other serious ailments. It all began when she was making a cape as a birthday present for her nephew. Rosenberger heard of a girl named Brenna who was battling a potentially deadly skin condition called harlequin ichthyosis. Anyone going through what she was going through had to be tough. “I had an aha moment,” Rosenberger says. “Brenna was a superhero! She needed a cape.” So Rosenberger sent her one, and Brenna’s mother was delighted. Rosenberger found ten more kids online and sent out ten more capes. Before long, she quit her job at a software company to dedicate herself full-time to tinysuperheroes.com, a…

During recess, I sat on the bench with my first-grade girls as they whiled away the time playing with my long ponytail. “Mrs. Rudiak, you are so beautiful!” one of them said. She then followed with the ultimate compliment: “You look just like a horse.” —LINDA RHODE-RUDIAK Castro Valley, California A reddit.com contributor named Simon explained that his extensive educational background came in handy when he worked as a store Santa, especially when faced with a smart-alecky preteen. “When I asked him what he wanted for Christmas, he flatly said, ‘Coal,’ ” recounts Simon. “Being a jovial spirit, I asked, ‘Bituminous or anthracite?’ “Absolutely threw him for a loop.” —RD.COM “Give me a scotch and CBD oil.” We have a team member called Jimmy who has a habit of writing…

Slice a peeled medium yellow onion crosswise into ⅛-inch-thick rounds. Arrange in a single layer, season lightly with salt, brush with olive oil, and microwave on high until onion is very soft and turning golden with some browned spots, about 15 minutes. Repeat with one red onion. In a small bowl, stir 5 ounces fresh goat cheese with ¼ cup milk until smooth. Season with pepper. Unfold one 14-ounce sheet defrosted puff pastry on a parchment-lined baking sheet. Leaving a ½-inch border, spread cheese and carefully top with onion. Bake at 400°F until pastry is puffed and golden and onions are more deeply golden, 20—25 minutes. Sprinkle with fresh thyme and rosemary, drizzle with olive oil, cut into squares, and serve.…

I HAVE ALWAYS WANTED and not wanted a cleaning person. I want very much for someone else to clean our house, as neither I nor my husband, Ed, has shown any aptitude for it, but I’d feel guilty inflicting such distasteful drudgery on another human. No one but me should have to clean up the dental floss heaped like spaghetti near the wastebasket where I toss it each night, never catching on that floss cannot be thrown with a high degree of accuracy. Imagine my joy upon reading that the iRobot company has invented the Roomba. The website plays a clip of an enlarged CD Walkman scooting across a living room carpet, sucking up detritus. Meanwhile, sentences run across the screen: “I’m having lunch with a friend” … “I’m planting…

Dad’s Mystery Package My father resembled a fruitcake. One year, he even sent one. It never arrived. ADAPTED FROM THE NEW YORK TIMES A FEW YEARS AGO, my father arranged to send me a mailorder fruitcake at Christmastime. Although I had a good job and owned an apartment in Manhattan, he feared my cupboards and refrigerator might be bare. I had recently moved from California, where my parents still lived in their suburban bungalow of 50 years, the house I grew up in. He wanted me to have a particular brand of fruitcake. Made in Texas, it was famous among fruitcake lovers—or, at least, among people who gave fruitcakes to those who were assumed to love them. “It reminds me of my mother’s,” he told me in a phone call.…

FROM CHICAGO Daru Smith was talking to his doctor and sister one day in December 2018 when he began to die. He saw their forms grow dim, a dark curtain coming down on them and himself in his fluorescent-lit hospital room at University of Chicago Medicine. Then the 29-year-old was above it all, looking into a hole in the ground where a torrent of water was swirling like a giant draining sink. And then he was in a hallway. At the end of it glowed a white light. He felt at peace. No more heart palpitations, no flutters, no aches. He saw pictures on a wall. Scenes from his life. His son being born. It felt good, the light. Until Daru realized: This is what happens when you die. He…

FROM THE WASHINGTON POST THE TEXT FROM my son said it all: “Dad, there’s an article you were born to write that the world is finally ready for: Bring Back the Handkerchief!” As my son knows, there s no bring back” for me. For me, the handkerchief never left. My mother raised me with several fixed rules. One was that a gentleman always has a clean handkerchief in his right rear pocket, a piece of simple cotton, roughly 15 inches square and less than four inches when folded. I was a dutiful son, but I can recall being a ten-year-old on the school playground, feeling the padding directly over my butt and wondering what it was there for Time would tell. Every night for most of my life, I have…

Quick Crossword EASY There’s no such thing as too much chocolate … or is there? Experts say these are the most commonly regifted items. Fit them into the grid. Sort It Out DIFFICULT The eight tiles below have been sorted into two groups according to a rule. Part of this rule is that in Group A, the three dots on each tile are arranged clockwise starting with the dot on top, and in Group B, they’re arranged counterclockwise. A B In which group does this tile belong? Here’s the Deal DIFFICULT Four playing cards, one of each suit, lie in a row on a table. They are a three, a four, a five, and a six. Using these clues, can you determine the cards’ suits and their order? ♦ The…