Table of contents for 7/17/2019 in Move!

IT is easy to judge other people when they do things that we don’t agree with. Often our beliefs are so strong that it is difficult to understand something from another person’s perspective. Yet, if you think about it, your beliefs might be something that someone else doesn’t believe in either. So who is right and who is wrong? The answer is that there is no right and wrong. Your faith and values and the things you believe in are just as important as the other person’s views. It would be a good thing to try to see where they are coming from. This will help to avoid judgement and also conflict that could arise as a result of your different standpoints. Try it and let us know if you’ve…

HE’S not much taller than the golf clubs he wields but don’t be deceived by his size. Dynamite comes in small packages, they say – and when it comes to whacking a ball down the green, Simthandile Tshabalala unleashes all his firepower. ‘HE ALWAYS WANTS TO PRACTISE TO DO BETTER’ So good is seven-year-old Simthandile, he was nicknamed Sim Tiger by officials at a championship in America last year. His chips and drives made them adapt his name to reflect one of the greatest golfers the world has ever seen: Tiger Woods. Simthandile is already a regular on golf courses around the world and last month was crowned the champion of a US Kids Golf tournament in North Carolina. “Being there was great. Simthandile was surrounded by his peers…

THE first episode of Rate My Plate kicked off with a spicy group of ladies who brought the laughs, #lewks, hilarious kitchen banter and, most importantly, they gave Chef Dede Wyt some tasty dishes. Sitty Zungu, Jerida Tsipa and Nomfundo Blose battled it out, but ultimately 19-year-old student and self-proclaimed foodie Sitty ticked all the boxes and grabbed the title. This is her mouthwatering winning dish with a healthy, hearty Harvestime spin – go on, try it! VEGGIE WAFFLES WITH FRIED CHICKEN AND FRESH MANGO CHUTNEY PREPARATION: ±30 MIN COOKING: ±30 MIN 750ml-1L sunflower oil for frying HOME-FRIED CHICKEN 500ml (2c) flour 30ml (2T) barbecue spice 15ml (1T) origanum 15ml (1T) peppercorns, crushed 15ml (1T) Aromat 15ml (1T) paprika 2 eggs 125ml (¼c) barbecue sauce 125ml (¼c) sweet-chilli sauce 8…

‘WHEN YOU TELL THE TRUTH, YOU SLEEP WELL AT NIGHT – THAT IS HOW ILIVE MY LIFE' WHEN she wants something, she goes out of her way to get it. So when Zodwa Wabantu (34) decided she wanted to marry Ntobeko Linda (24), nothing was going to stop her. Known for bucking norms, she shocked the country when she proposed to her boyfriend of six years, even going on one knee. But even those who’d been following her journey in the spotlight were stunned when she went against culture and paid R80 000 lobola for her bae. To shake things up even more, she sentan all-women dl e egatin o to Ntobeko’s house for the negotiations, something that’s unheard of in African culture. Some called it a publicity stunt, but…

SINCE childhood Azara Raphael knew she was different from other kids. Her journey to become who she wants to be, a transgender woman, has been a painful one marked by abuse from relatives and discrimination in her community. She wants people to know transgender women are everywhere, and that they are just like everyone else. “We have careers and families. The only thing we can’t do is bear children, but we are who we are.” KNOWING HERSELF Azara (34) has always known she was a woman in a male body. During her childhood she had the unflinching love and support of her parents. “I have always been comfortable with myself and my sexuality because of the support from my family. They never treated me differently from my two younger siblings…

1 Nasty C’s Strings and Bling album was recently certified . . .? A Gold B Platinum C Double Platinum D Silver 2 . . . is a stage in life when a woman stops having her monthly period? A Folliculogenesis B Menopause C Andropause D Hypogonadism 3 Namibia gained independence from South Africa in . . .? A 1988 B 1990 C 1992 D 1996 4 Which South African artist features on Disney’s new Lion King remake soundtrack? A Lebo M B Lady Zamar C Lira D Samthing Soweto 5 How tall is Hyperion, a coastal redwood that is the tallest known tree in the world? A 88m B 142m C 40m D 116m 6 In its most severe form, which contagious viral illness can cause nerve injury leading…

Tip When wearing prints, opt for something formfitting such as this belted dress. It creates an empire waistline and an hourglass figure. Wear a pencil skirt that ends just above the knee to create length, with a statement shirt tucked in and a belt to pinch in your waist. When wearing a high-neck dress, make sure it ends just above the knee so you can pair it with stockings and open-toe heels, which are on trend now. High-waisted pants accentuate curves. Pair with heels and roll up the bottoms of the pants slightly to create the illusion of longer legs. If you choose high-waisted jeans, tuck in your shirt or top to show off your curves. Add a belt to a loose-fitting dress to create shape. Pair it with stockings…

LIPS SUGAR POUT YOU’LL NEED Brown sugar Petroleum jelly STEP 1 Pour sugar into a small jar. Leave a little space for the petroleum jelly. STEP 2 Add about 10ml (2t) of petroleum jelly and mix with a teaspoon. RESULT Smoother lips with no dead skin cells. FACE OAT & HONEY SCRUB YOU’LL NEED Pure honey Oats Rosehip oil STEP 1 Fill a medium jar halfway with honey. STEP 2 Add oats, leaving room for more squeezes of honey. STEP 3 Add a few drops of the rosehip oil. STEP 4 Pour honey until jar is full and mix with a teaspoon. RESULT Softer-feeling skin that’s wonderfully hydrated. BODY SUGAR SCRUB YOU’LL NEED Brown sugar Jojoba oil Olive oil STEP 1 Fill a medium jar three-quarters full with sugar. STEP…

YOU started on your ARVs to suppress HIV. You also mastered positive living, including eating healthily, having protected sex, exercising, avoiding harmful habits and managing stress. This is great and the results are showing with an increased CD4 count and decreased viral load. The challenge now is to maintain the tempo. When your health starts improving, it's easy to relax and take your foot off the health pedal. MESSING WITH YOUR MEDICATION When you visit your doctor and they tell you about your undetectable viral load and improved CD4 count, you can become a little too happy. It's in that moment that you start to relax with your intake of ARVs – and maybe you skip a dose now and then. Moreover, you're no longer being strict about the time…

Don’t try to argue with the child, parenting specialist Nikki Bush says. One of the biggest mistakes parents make when their kids get out of control is to retaliate. Try to distract the child When they start nagging because they’re not getting their way, focus their attention on things around them. For example, you could say, “Okay, let’s look for the red tins on the shelf” or “Go and count how many plastic balls there are in the restaurant’s play area.” Stay calm If your child is still being disobedient, calmly take them by the hand and lead them to a quiet area. Explain why their behaviour is unacceptable and that they should apologise. If they don’t want to cooperate explain that you’ll be going home immediately if their attitude…

ALMOST everyone wants to be wealthy, but only a few people truly know what they need to become rich. Have you ever wondered why you have not become as rich as you envisioned? We all know we need money in all the aspects of our lives, and I’d like to give you insight into just one of the places where you should be looking for your money. There are various places where our treasure hides and once we identify them, we'll never go wrong. MONEY HIDES IN TALENT Everyone has a God-given gift. When we are born, we come out with our hands folded and it's believed this indicates we are holding our gifts as we arrive on planet earth. Proverbs 22: 2: “The rich and poor meet together: the…

Greedy traditional leaders or chiefs must stop demanding money from poor people. Some still abuse their people by ordering them to work on their fields as punishment or taking away land from families inhabiting it for generations on the grounds that it is communally owned. They impose exorbitant fines on their people for no reason. The government is aware of this, but not much is done to stop it. Traditional leaders should work in partnership with government to improve the lives of communities - stability and development in rural areas can bring about economic opportunities. People fear traditional leaders who have become dictators. Some chiefs respect and work well with their people. Communities can only work if traditional leaders and communities work together to improve the village. Chiefs are not…

HE flexes his fingers and grins with delight as he gazes at his shiny red and blue limb. The stylised spider logo on his high-tech plastic hand would be right at home in a Spider-Man movie – and for nine-year-old Aphelele Gumede, it’s a dream come true. Not only does he finally have two working hands, he’s an avid Spider-Man fan so you could say he’s become his own version of the web-throwing superhero. Aphelele, from Umlazi in Durban, was recently fitted with a one-of-a-kind prosthetic hand – the culmination of a nine-year search. The little boy’s parents had all but given up hope of finding a prosthetic replacement – at R600 000, it was far more than the family could hope to afford. GOOD SAMARITANS Now thanks to international…

CLEVER A dentist, after completing work on a patient, comes to him and asks, “Could you help me? Could you give out a few of your loudest, most painful screams?” The surprised patient asks, “But why doctor? It wasn’t all that bad this time!” The dentist replies, “There are so many people in the waiting room right now, and I don’t want to miss the four o’clock train.” THE LOTTERY ■ A man comes home one day and says to his wife, “Darling, what would you do if I said I’ve won the lottery?” His wife replies, “I’d take half then leave you.” Smiling, he responds, “Excellent! I had three numbers and won 10 rand. “Here’s five, now get the hell out of here!” ■ An English teacher asks her…

Q I LOVE SUNDRESSES, SO HOW CAN I WEAR ONE IN WINTER? A Well, it’s simple – layering is key for taking a wardrobe from one season to the next. One creative way you can incorporate dresses into your winter wardrobe is with the use of polo necks. They are extremely chic and classic. Wear a polo neck under your dress, with tights and boots, and you’ll be ready to face the cold weather. Another way of wearing a sundress, if you’re not a polo-neck fan, is by layering your dress with a cardigan or a sweater. Pairing these items will keep the cold at bay and make you look warm and stylish.…

MY SKIN BECOMES VERY SENSITIVE AND DRY AFTER I EXFOLIATE IT. SHOULD I STOP EXFOLIATING? Your skin is likely to be dry and sensitive and you're either exfoliating your skin too vigorously or using the wrong product. Use gentle exfoliating products and be gentle yourself when using them. Also keep your routine to once a week and see how that goes. Use a rich moisturiser after you’ve exfoliated to soothe your skin. Exfoliating is one of the best ways to keep your skin soft, bright, and healthy, but overdoing it can have damaging side effects. If you exfoliate once a week, you can reap the benefits of exfoliating without damaging your skin.…

‘CAN MY HUSBAND SELL HIS COMPANY WITHOUT MY CONSENT?’ Q DO I HAVE A SAY IN MY HUBBY'S BUSINESS? I'm married in community of property and I work at a company that's solely owned by my husband. He is also the sole director. My husband has been approached by someone to buy the business and he is considering it. I need to know if he sells the company, do I have to give my written consent as a spouse or can he sell the company without my consent? ANONYMOUS, DURBAN A As a spouse married in community of property, you and your husband have a joint estate. However, a business is a separate legal entity and it doesn't form part of the joint estate while the two of you are…

‘I HAVE KNOWINGLY INFECTED MY PARTNERS WITH HIV AND I FEEL BAD’ Q I HATE MEN I was raped by my father as a child and later by my uncle. For most of my life I haven’t been able to form strong, lasting relationships with men. I'm just full of anger and hatred towards men. How can I deal with this? ANONYMOUS, POLOKWANE A It's unfortunate that the people you trusted and who had the responsibility to protect you are the ones who violated you. I recommend you get professional help to deal with the emotional and psychological damage caused by the trauma. Your hatred towards men is one of the effects of your trauma and counselling will help you identify and resolve other negative effects of your childhood trauma.…

Be aware of how tense or relaxed you are. You need to be comfortable to breathe well. Posture Sit or stand upright – this allows deeper breathing and gives the diaphragm more space to move. Breathe through your nose - it helps prepare air that enters your body. The hairs that line your nostrils filter particles of dust and dirt that can be harmful for your lungs. Breathing through your mouth tends to be shallower. Discover your diaphragm The lungs don’t have muscles so the job of breathing is done primarily by the diaphragm (the large dome-shaped muscle at the base of the lungs). Between 70-80% of inhaling should be done by the diaphragm. It reduces tension and tightness in the neck and shoulders and lowers the heart and breathing…

I found out my husband was cheating on me but I forgave him. Then I started getting sick and losing weight. I thought I was stressed but I tested HIV positive. I divulged this to my husband, and he came clean and confessed that he was also HIV positive. Instead of leaving him, I decided to forgive him and continue travelling this journey with him. We started going to church a couple of months ago and have received marriage counselling. Just as I thought we were making progress, I discovered he hasn’t stopped cheating and in fact it has got worse because he's seeing a woman who is as young as our daughter – 22. I don’t know what to do anymore. I seriously thought he'd stopped cheating and had…

TAIMI HAIKELA The best way a parent can avoid tantrums is to raise their children to understand that “no” means “no”. Explaining to them why they can’t have a specific item will teach them to understand and let it go. Don’t make promises you can’t keep either – they won’t trust you. MPHO SHWATJA Children don’t throw tantrums because they’re brats or weren’t raised well. When my children throw tantrums in public I simply ignore them. When they see I’m not taking their nonsense they keep quiet. I hug and kiss them afterwards, and all is well. MAGS MOGANE Most kids who throw tantrums are children with conditions such as autism, ADHD etc. Those children find it hard to understand “no”. It’s not like the parents don’t discipline these kids.…

Don’t give out private information, such as your ID number, physical address and banking details to strangers. If you decide to meet, do so in a public place. Also, tell a friend where you are going and when you expect to be back. Don’t do anything that makes you uncomfortable. Always trust your instincts. Don’t assume that the person is who they say they are. It’s easy to pretend or provide false information over the phone or online. DISCLAIMER: Move! magazine will not be held responsible/liable for anything that may arise with regard to readers providing each other with personal information. We advise participants to protect themselves from any criminal intent/activity.…

Actress and chef Lucia Mthiyane (43) dropped a couple of dress sizes recently by cutting meat out of her diet. “I wanted to quit the first week but kept going. The second week got easier especially because I started seeing the results,” she said about the process. Move! readers have their say: I can relate. Going vegan was the best thing I did. - MAMARE MAKGABA But I love meat. - MERCY MOGAU Different strokes for different folks. - CILIA LOUISA MALAZA Well done Lucia, you look amazing even though you always looked great either way especially being in your mid-50s ... keep it up as some of us continue eating meat mo-girl. - ROSETTA ZWANE She has been 43 years (for) 10 years. - NOMNOTHO ZIBS MAZIBUKO…

More and more South Africans are making use of social media, especially WhatsApp, for personal conversations, business and even their stokvels. With that said, you may have more than one WhatsApp group, with three or more members. This can get too much and disturb you when you are at work. Responding to all messages can be a tedious exercise. Useful solutions It is important for members to send messages only if it is necessary. Members should also send messages, images and videos that are related or useful to stokvel members. The cost of data in South Africa is quite high, and not everyone can afford it. It is advisable for members to send messages or voice notes where possible as opposed to videos, which use up a lot of data.…

BEAT THE BLOAT Take the wait out of weight loss with CLA Fat Burners. It’s a lean muscle toner exercise in a thermogenic fat-burning formula that helps you shed kilos rapidly and prevents fat absorption with its fat-binding formula. There’s also a handy diet plan included for both men and women. Available at Dis-Chem, most pharmacies and selected stores. Call 021-788-6947 for more information. SLEEP EASY The new Sealy Salvador pillow top comes with added cushioning to give you a much-needed luxurious night’s sleep. You’ll never have to turn your mattress over thanks to the built-in non-turn technology – simply rotate it from head to foot once a month. Finished with aloe vera fabric which is breathable and cooling, it retails at R6 999. For more info, go to www.bradlows.co.za…

SHE’S been out of the spotlight, enjoying her life and being a wife to the “love of her life” and a mother to her two daughters. But now that her youngest is eight months old, Xoli Zondi (35) is ready to get back into the swing of things. And what better way than with a role as Nkanyezi Shezi on e.tv’s new drama Isipho? Now viewers will get to see her as more than the wild Zodwa she played on SABC 1’s Generations back in the day. She’s excited to be back on TV, Xoli tells Move!, but she does miss her husband and children now that’s she’s busy shooting in Joburg. THE NEW ROLE She’s had to move back to Joburg for the role on Isipho after spending years…

SCREAMING and shaking congregants, a pastor performing ‘miracles’ and cooked dog meat for lunch. That’s just one day in Pastor Veteran Peter Ratsatsi’s Heaven on Earth Ministries in Mahikeng, North West, where every sermon is full of so much drama that it could rival South Africa’s TV soapies for viewership. The pastor recently came under fire after he cooked and served a dog to his congregants in celebration of their one-year anniversary as a church in June. IN THE SPOTLIGHT But it’s not the first time he’s been in the spotlight. He’s posted videos of himself resurrecting a congregant, who he claimed had died after oxygen deprivation. In the video, he asks a fellow church member to close the other’s mouth and nose, in effect “killing him”. Pastor Peter (34)…

LEMON DRIZZLE PUDDINGS Ground almonds add nuttiness but cake flour or polenta is more affordable. SERVES: 4-6 PREPARATION: 15-20 MIN BAKING: 25-30 MIN ■ 50g butter, at room temperature ■ 125ml (½c) sugar ■ 3 eggs ■ 250ml (1c) cake flour ■ 7,5ml (1½t) baking powder ■ Pinch of salt ■ 125ml (½c) ground almonds, flour or polenta ■ 180ml (¾c) milk SYRUP ■ 125ml (½c) water ■ 250ml (1c) sugar ■ 125ml (½c) lemon juice ■ 15ml (1T) butter TO SERVE ■ Lemon wedges ■ A few fresh mint sprigs ■ Ice cream or whipped cream (optional) ■ Preheat the oven to 180°C. Grease 4-6 small cake tins or ramekins well with nonstick spray. 1 Cream the butter and sugar until smooth. Add the eggs one by one, beating…

‘MY DAUGHTER IS A VIRGIN – HOW CAN I PREPARE HER FOR HER FIRST SEXUAL EXPERIENCE?’ Q I HAVE AN URGE TO MAKE LOVE OUTDOORS I am a very adventurous person but my partner is not as exciting. So I am the one who consistently has to introduce new things into our relationship as far as sex is concerned. Lately, I have an urge to make love outdoors. How do I start to introduce this to my partner? ANONYMOUS, KEMPTON PARK A There is a very thin line between your dream of making love outdoors and public indecency. So, you need to plan your session as carefully as possible. Security and the fact that people take videos of everything they come across should also be at the back of your…

Kolobe Mushi, counselling social worker at The Family Life Centre’s Diepsloot office, says: “First of all, you need to change your perception of how you see this situation. “The sangoma has given you her opinion on this matter. However, the best thing you can do now for both you and your husband is to visit a medical doctor together. “There might be something medically wrong in your reproductive system that’s causing the miscarriages. “Remember the stepchildren have done nothing wrong to you and they need your love and protection. “Maybe both you and your husband could have marriage counselling to address these issues that are causing so much trauma.”…

Tactical breathing is a calming technique borrowed from the military, says Dr Belisa Vranich. It uses lower body breathing: inhale for four, hold for four, exhale for six, hold for two. Repeat five times. Keep it simple, suggests Dr Ntodeni Ndwamato – stop what you’re doing, breathe in through your nose, then exhale deeply through your nose. Repeat six times. Practise breathing properly for 20 minutes daily, says Denise Humphris. Sit with your eyes closed, breathe deeply in and out through your nose.…

BARBARA MATIKI Get out of that toxic marriage before you go crazy. You will only heal outside of the marriage. There is someone out there waiting to love and take care of you. If you stay in this marriage, you will be miserable forever. Most of all, love yourself. WENDY SITHOLE Do what your heart or mind tells you. This depends on how much you value your wellbeing. As I see it, you only have two choices: go or stay. But I think by leaving this marriage you will be saving yourself a lot of pain and disgrace. KIDEO FUZANE Forgiving him the first time was your worst mistake. This is a clear example that sometimes people don't deserve a second chance. Forgive yourself and move on. This is not…

YOU’VE just decided to go into business. You have an idea of what your business plan will look like, and you know how much money you hope to make at the end of each month. But how do you get there? This is what author Precious Mvulane outlines in her book, The Essential Finance Handbook for Entrepreneurs. In this extract, she gives practical steps to follow on your way to being the best business person you can be. DECIDE ON YOUR GOALS Setting financial goals is the first step in building your wealth and financial freedom. Like anything in life, you don’t get what you don’t plan for. Setting financial goals is like deciding on taking a trip – you need to know the destination first. Your financial goals are…

1 The car you and your partner share keeps breaking down and needs replacing. Your partner wants to buy a newer model, and take out a loan to pay for it. Would you agree with him? A No, you would insist on buying a reliable car without taking out a loan. B Yes, as long as the loan repayments were manageable. C Yes. You would get a much better car now and not have to pay for it immediately. 2 It’s your first anniversary. You are saving for a deposit on a new home and have agreed not to buy each other expensive gifts. Then your guy splashes out on a lavish present for you. How would you react? A Annoyed. He has spent money he should be saving. B…

WHEN friends live in different cities, it's sometimes hard to get together and plan events. So when Bongekile Macupe (in white dress) got pregnant, her friends agreed to host a welcome party for the baby rather than a baby shower. This was to accommodate everyone who has to travel to Joburg. The friends, from Gauteng and the Eastern Cape, celebrated Linamandla’s birth with a floral-themed party.…